you know what, I’m gonna take them up on this. I’m gonna call and say, “Hey, yeah. I’m planning a human sacrifice party. Gosh, you have no idea how many venues have turned me down on this, and then - bam! There it was, right in your brochure. What a god send. If I didn’t find a good place, they’d make ME the sacrifice next year, ya know what I mean! So, anyway, I’m gonna have about 500 people. What dates are available?”

filed under: and then i'll be all pissed when they say it was a joke. my life.
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